SoulThirst

Haven't blogged for a week; whoops. As most of you probably know, it's Spring Camp this coming weekend. Most of my week was spent doing prep stuff for it. In fact, it took us from 7:30pm till 1:30am on Monday night (yes, 6 hours) to put the small groups together. As I'm writing this, I have a sinking feeling that I'm forgetting something... either something that we need to bring to camp, or something that I need to do, a phone call to make, etc. etc. @_@.

The process going into camp does feel "different" this year, though I'm not sure why. I'm sure one component of it for me, being in the planning of it, is just the process of putting it together and all the stresses involved. One huge prayer request for me is that I don't get "lost" in all that planning & become distracted from the heart & soul of camp. Also just that my mood/attitude will be a right one (i.e. I won't get frustrated at people, stressed at what doesn't work, etc.). My mind has felt very "busy" this week... frenetic, unsettled. Even now, there are a couple things unsettling me.

I don't know what to expect for camp, which probably sounds odd coming from me, considering that I've been at 2 camps/retreats per year for the past 10 years... you do the math :P. I'm glad Jerry Root is our speaker. Although I've been in 7 classes over 3 years with him as my professor, there always is something more I can learn from him. He is indeed the man of God that I hope to someday be. There's something about his love for God and love for people that is special. He's the "picture" of a humble man, in my mind- greatly gifted and respected, yet a servant like Christ. In all the lessons/talks/sharings that I've heard him give, it's usually not him talking about anything "new" about God that I might not've heard before... but it's reminding me of what I know... and what it looks like when it's real. And so in some ways at camp, I'm a student again, listening to my teacher. And while I know what stories he might tell & what he might say, I don't know what to expect; I never do when Jerry teaches. All I know is that he helps me see God every time.

So as some of you know, I got DDR pads last week. And as of last night, we now have a modded Playstation here at Living Water; Jeff Chou generously donated his old one. And as soon as I get copies of the DDR mixes from people, yes, we will have DDR here :P. It's all for you guys, ok?

posted by Andy Chang @ 12:47 AM 0 comments

Haha, got back from Naperville Central to pick up something from Vicky ^^. First time at/in Central, got to wander around the school & "explore," while still trying to not look like an out-of-place 4-years out of high school person ^^;;;. The school layout actually isn't TOO confusing... I've seen worse :P. It seems a lil... cramped. I dunno, like some of the interior hallways weren't well-lit, plus the predominatly red/black/blue color scheme (with the occasional white) made the school seem "smaller" (white/bright colors make a place appear bigger), so it felt like I was walking through tunnels. It's not a bad thing... if... tunnels are your cup o' tea :P. Finally found my way to the gym area where I ran into Ariel & then followed her over to the fieldhouse. Heh, the school actually HAS a "fieldhouse"... my old high school just has the main gym, aux gym, & that's it.

Then I had to find my way BACK through the school to the front parking lot ~_~. Oh what fun. Actually, it sorta is. I actually really do enjoy making school-visits- mainly to be able to talk & interact with students "on their turf"- in an environment outside of church, where their friends are around, etc. etc. All the recent times I've visited a high school was like for concerts & such, where most of the building is empty/locked-down. This was the first time in a long while where I was visiting a high school close enough to dismissal time that a lot of students were still there going about their normal high school business. It was... interesting, being in the midst of it all again. I was resisting the urge to "be a youth worker" and start observing/taking notes about the socio-cultural dimensions of the average high school student ^^;;.

Oh yah, my DDR ignition pads arrived today... the 1-inch thick nice non-slipping pads XD XD. But yah, I don't actually HAVE DDR here ~_~. Well, not really. Josh has a version for the computer I think & also a connector that goes from Playstation input to computer input. Thanks Dan for letting me borrow your PS/konamix to test out my pads. So yea... if any of you youth DDR people want to use those pads, to drop by, etc. I'm open for that. Dunno how long I'll have Dan's PS for, but I'll always have the pads around here.

Mom & Dad won't be coming out this weekend; Dad's agency got an e-mail advising all division employees to postpone any non-essential trips for a month. So they've rescheduled tentatively for Easter-ish to come out here.

Ok. time to go finish some prep stuff for tonight.

posted by Andy Chang @ 5:22 PM 0 comments

Fell asleep watching the news :P. CNN gets quite boring after a while... the military analysts start repeating themselves & there really isn't much more going on. I kinda hate how our media does that... it's like after 9-11 or any other big news event... they just keep going & going & going until you're sick of hearing anymore. It's also kinda funny to see a lil map of Iraq on the screen & then see a lil model or picture of a stealth bomber that marks "here they are"... it's like we're telling Saddam "lookie! if you can't find our stealth bomber because it's stealth, just watch CNN! there it is!" ~_~. Yea. and they explain "this is how our smart-bombs work" ... greaaaaat idea; explain all our technology, why don't ya ~_~. Yes, I know that the "real" military stuff is still classified & the CNN release doesn't really make THAT much of a difference at all, but still... it's just kind of... silly. There's smarter ways to fight a war ~_~.

Seems pretty clear to me from today, that God's will always triumphs in His church. There've been a couple issues within CCMC on the large-scale going on (sorry, I can't go into detail here) and as difficult as some of these issues are, it shows to me that when people fail to obey (either by ignorance or willful rebellion), God still forces things to happen. One example that I can go into detail is this: starting this summer, Lincoln Junior High is undergoing renovations... meaning that by summer, we'll need another facility for our Naperville worship services (since we won't have classrooms for Sunday School). The "coincidence" is that recently the church has realized that we'll be outgrowing Lincoln soon anyway & we either need to find a new facility or build our own. At the same time, not everyone is agreed as to "where to move to" (or if we should build our own building, etc.). I find in very interesting that this summer, whether we want to or not, God is in essence forcing us to move ahead (literally) and get going with this whole church expansion/facility issue.

It's been a really good week, but also a really full week. A lot to be thinking about/praying about, but I'm glad for that... because the sense of needing God comes along with it. It's almost like there's so much I could write about & from so many different angles that I don't know where to go at it from. I think what I'll do is wait until I've got it more figured out, and then you'll hear from me.

Hope you finish tomorrow/the week off well... it's okie, at least spring break is coming up. prayin for you ^_^.
Glad you'll be back next week for break ^_^

posted by Andy Chang @ 11:56 PM 0 comments

So yea... if you didn't read the notice on my Xanga or on what used to be my blog, please reset your bookmarks & links to point here instead. I posted the reason why on the other 2 sites. *thwaps Blogger*

The weather was beautiful today... got over 50 degrees during the day, & was even 40-something an hour ago when I got home. Spring is coming. mm. Like you said a couple blog-posts ago, there is definitely something refreshing and nice about springtime ^^. Wish I coulda done something today. But it was nice, even while driving back after worship team, to have the windows down & the K-pop techno goin ^_^.

Went to pick up Mark & Val from Midway, then headed into Chinatown for a later dinner XD. The line for both Joy Yee's and Peneng were out the door :P (and this was at almost 9:00pm ~_~), so we settled for good ol' Seven Treasures :P (Seven Ghettos, for the Wheaton students ~_~). Definitely not Joy Yee's, but hey, I'm not gonna complain. For one, it's not like I could cook any better (or even near it), and second, any food that's provided like that is a blessing. Besides, since the place wasn't so crowded, we got to enjoy a nice relaxed meal, getting to catch up & such (rather than be in a crowded, noisy, stuffy place).

That penguin picture you found was hilarious XD XD.

Hamlet & Hamlet arrived in the mail today (shipping only took 2 days, go figure). So if some of you are by LW, you can take a peek; otherwise, they're not leaving the house (or the room, for that matter).

This whole week, despite feeling that I haven't made the most of my time, has been a good week. The lack of discipline is something I acknowledge, and move on to improve on this week, not something for me to regret & dwell on. Sometimes I wonder if that's what happens to a lot of us (especially a lot of you students whom I talk to)... where there's a bad week, a bad test, a bad decision, etc. And certainly you aren't supposed to "move on" as in "ignore what happened." But having acknowledged what went wrong or where you messed up, then just keep on going. As sure as death & taxes are (speaking of taxes, I gotta do mine ~_~), messing up is another sure-thing life. But that's why there's grace.

There's way too many blogs/Xangas for me to go through in a given week now... just look at the links on the left (for either my blog or Xanga, whichever version you're reading), and you can see that I can't get through it all (I confess, the only blogs & check every day are like the chicklets blogs; all others, I wait for Xanga to send me the subscriptions). So I can't keep up with everyone like I'd like to; also by not being on AIM, it cuts down on interaction too. But again, everyone please do e-mail- or better yet, call- and keep in touch, at the very least, to let me know how I can pray for you. In flipping through the opening chapter of John Piper's book "Brothers, We Are Not Professionals," Piper writes to pastors/ministers and says:
our first business is to pant after God in prayer
and the whole stress of the chapter (& book) is to say to those in ministry (i.e. people like me) that ministry is not a "job," it is not a "profession." Sometimes I'm tempted to think that way, but it really can't be justified. Preparing Bible Studies is not "work"... neither is getting together with people or teaching, preaching, etc. (maybe a deacon meeting is "work," but that's a gray area ~_~). Point is, with all the time I have in my week, it's time where I have to be praying for all of you, time to write, time to plumb the depths of Scripture. None of what I have to do is "work". So yes... make my days meaningful by letting me know how I can pray for you, how I can better serve you (the comments/chatterbox now works again).

posted by Andy Chang @ 1:02 AM 0 comments

Ash Wednesday
Ash Wednesday, marks the beginning of Lent. It isn't exactly a "happy" holiday or anything. In fact, the reason why it is called "Ash Wednesday" is that back in the day, on this day, people would come to church, and the priest would dip his finger into a bowl of ashes, and then make the mark of a cross on each person's forehead. As he did that, he would say something that usually included the phrases "ashes to ashes, dust to dust" as a reminder to everyone that we are just human beings and that we eventually die (in Genesis 3, God tells Adam that because he sinned, he would die "since from dust you came and to dust you will return"). Ash Wednesday is the day when Christians remember 2 things:
1) That we are human; that we are not God, and that we have the weaknesses of being human, which ultimately means that someday we will die. This also then causes us to remember that God is God who is greater than us and who is immortal.
2) That we are sinners; we die because we are sinners and we live in a sinful world. Ash Wednesday is a day of confession, where we own up to our sins and confess before God that we're pretty messed up people.


Ash Wednesday Order of Worship
Taken from the Book of Common Prayer
Almighty and everlasting God, you hate nothing you have made and forgive the sins of all who are penitent: Create and make in us new and contrite hearts, that we, worthily lamenting our sins and acknowledging our wickedness, may obtain of you, the God of all mercy, perfect remission
and forgiveness; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever.
=Amen.=

THE FIRST READING: Joel 2:1-2, 12-17
A Reading From the Prophet Joel

"Blow the trumpet in Zion; sound the alarm on my holy mountain! Let all the inhabitants of the land tremble, for the day of the LORD is coming, it is near - a day of darkness and gloom, a day of clouds and thick darkness! Like blackness spread upon the mountains a great and powerful army comes; their like has never been from of old, nor will be again after them in ages to come. Yet even now, says the LORD, return to me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning; rend your hearts and not your clothing. Return to the LORD, your God, for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love, and relents from punishing. Who knows whether he will not turn and relent, and leave a blessing behind him, a grain offering and a drink offering for the LORD, your God? Blow the trumpet in Zion; sanctify a fast; call a solemn assembly; gather the people. Sanctify the congregation; assemble the aged; gather the children, even infants at the breast. Let the bridegroom leave his room, and the bride her canopy. Between the vestibule and the altar let the priests, the ministers of the LORD, weep. Let them say, "Spare your people, O LORD, and do not make your heritage a mockery, a byword among the nations. Why should it be said among the peoples, 'Where is their God?'"

Psalm 103
8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
15 As for man, his days are like grass,
he flourishes like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.
17 But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
18 with those who keep his covenant
and remember to obey his precepts.


Dear People of God: The first Christians observed with great devotion the days of our Lord's passion and resurrection, and it became the custom of the Church to prepare for them by a season of penitence and fasting. This is season of Lent provided a time in which converts to the faith were prepared for Holy
Baptism. It was also a time when those who, because of notorious sins, had been separated from the body of the faithful were reconciled by penitence and forgiveness, and restored to the fellowship of the Church. Thereby, the whole congregation was put in mind of the message of pardon and absolution set forth in the Gospel of our Savior, and of the need which all Christians continually have to renew their repentance and faith.

I invite you, therefore, in the name of the Church, to the observance of a holy Lent, by self-examination and repentance; by prayer, fasting, and self-denial; and by reading and meditating on God's immortality and penitence, that we may remember that it is only by your gracious gift that we are given everlasting life; through Jesus Christ our Savior.
=Amen.=

Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.

Psalm 51 =Miserere mei, Deus=

1 Have mercy on me, O God, according to your loving-kindness; *
in your great compassion blot out my offenses.
2 Wash me through and through from my wickedness *
and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions, *
and my sin is ever before me.
4 Against you only have I sinned *
and done what is evil in your sight.
5 And so you are justified when you speak *
and upright in your judgment
6 Indeed, I have been wicked from my birth, *
a sinner from my mother's womb.
7 For behold, you look for truth deep within me, *
and will make me understand wisdom secretly.
8 Purge me from my sin, and I shall be pure;
wash me, and I shall be clean indeed.
9 Make me hear of joy and gladness, *
that the body you have broken may rejoice.
10 Hide your face from my sins *
and blot out all my iniquities.
11 Create in me a clean heart, O God, *
and renew a right spirit within me.
12 Cast me not away from your presence *
and take not your holy Spirit from me.
13 Give me the joy of your saving help again *
and sustain me with your bountiful Spirit.
14 I shall teach your ways to the wicked, *
and sinners shall return to you.
15 Deliver me from death, O God, *
and my tongue shall sing of your righteousness,
O God of my salvation.
16 Open my lips, O Lord, *
and my mouth shall proclaim your praise.
17 Had you desired it, I would have offered sacrifice; *
but you take no delight in burnt-offerings.
18 The sacrifice of God is a troubled spirit; *
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

Most holy and merciful Father:
We confess to you and to one another,
and to the whole communion of saints
in heaven and on earth,
that we have sinned by our own fault
in thought, word, and deed;
by what we have done, and by what we have left undone.


We have not loved you with our whole heart, and mind, and strength. We have not loved our neighbors as ourselves. We have not forgiven others, as we have been forgiven.
=Have mercy on us, Lord.=

We have been deaf to your call to serve, as Christ served us.We have not been true to the mind of Christ. We have grieved your Holy Spirit.
=Have mercy on us, Lord.=

We confess to you, Lord, all our past unfaithfulness: the pride, hypocrisy, and impatience of our lives,
=We confess to you, Lord.=

Our self-indulgent appetites and ways, and our exploitation of other people,
=We confess to you, Lord.=

Our anger at our own frustration, and our envy of those more fortunate than ourselves,
=We confess to you, Lord.=

Our intemperate love of worldly goods and comforts, and our dishonesty in daily life and work,
=We confess to you, Lord.=

Our negligence in prayer and worship, and our failure to commend the faith that is in us,
=We confess to you, Lord.=

Accept our repentance, Lord, for the wrongs we have done: for our blindness to human need and suffering, and our indifference to injustice and cruelty,
=Accept our repentance, Lord.=

For all false judgments, for uncharitable thoughts toward our neighbors, and for our prejudice and contempt toward those who differ from us,
=Accept our repentance, Lord.=

For our waste and pollution of your creation, and our lack of concern for those who come after us,
=Accept our repentance, Lord.=

Restore us, good Lord, and let your anger depart from us;
=Favorably hear us, for your mercy is great.

Accomplish in us the work of your salvation,
=That we may show forth your glory in the world.=

Almighty God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who desires not the death of sinners, but rather that they may turn from their wickedness and live, has given power and commandment to his ministers to declare and pronounce to his people, being penitent, the absolution and remission of their sins. He pardons and absolves all those who truly repent, and with sincere hearts believe his holy Gospel.

Therefore we beseech him to grant us true repentance and his Holy Spirit, that those things may please him which we do on this day, and that the rest of our life hereafter may be pure and holy, so that at the last we may come to his eternal joy; through Jesus Christ our Lord.
=Amen.=

posted by Andy Chang @ 12:51 PM 0 comments

Lent: An old-school tradition brought to life
Note to some of my more "academic" readers: Much of my description of Lent is put in layman's terms and takes a very practical approach to it. This is mainly for the benefit of my youth group kids, for whom this particular post is written for in describing Lent to them. More "meditative" and "theological" reflections will be forthcoming.

Everybody knows about Christmas and Easter, but not many know about Lent. Lent is a period of 40-days (and 6 Sundays) that start fron Ash Wednesday & goes till Easter. In the Bible, 40 is an important number: Jesus was in the desert for 40 days & was tempted there; Moses spent 40 years in the desert; the prophet Elijah walked in the desert for 40 days; etc. The number 40 had the meaning of "a complete time, a full time;" it was like saying "enough time has passed and things have run its course." Lent is not a very "joyful" time period, because of what it is preparing us for. If we were to fast-forward to 40 days later, we would see Christ being betrayed, arrested, unfairly tried, and then crucified. Lent was the time when Christians spent the 40 days giving extra time to praying and reading God's Word as part of preparing to remember Jesus Christ and the cross. During Lent, we remember the sufferings that Jesus patiently endured, both while he lived on earth and when he was crucified.

Why "celebrate" or remember Lent?
1. In all of Christian history, Jesus' death on the cross and His resurrection from the dead are the most important events. Every year, Easter is marked on our calendars because it calls us to remember such an important event- not just as an event, but also what it means to us personally. When there is an important occasion coming up, usually it calls for being prepared for it. Because Easter is so important, it makes sense that we take a longer time to prepare for it (and we already looked at why 40 days was important)
2. We human beings are creatures of habit- we like patterns and we like doing the same things over & over. During Lent, we prepare ourselves by giving more time to prayer and reading God's Word because by doing that, it becomes habit to us; our attention is focused on it. This gives us a greater appreciation for what we are preparing for when it arrives.
3. It helps us "get into the story." For some of you, you've heard the "Easter story" so many times over the years that it seems a bit "boring" or "old" to you. Usually that's because we're not really "into" the story. To really get into it, it means like putting yourself as one of the characters, trying to imagine being in the setting, reading/watching/listening to the story being told in a fresh way, etc. The only way to get into it is to spend a lot of time in the story in the first place. Lent gives us 40 days to really get into the story, so that when Easter comes, we're into it, and it is meaningful to us.

How do you celebrate Lent?
Depending on how your church does it, there's no one right way. But here are some suggestions:
- Consider reading the gospel accounts of Jesus' final week on earth during your quiet times. (Matthew 26-28, Mark 14-15, Luke 22-24, John 13-21) Again, this is to help you "get into the story"
- Consider giving up something for the 40 days (AIM, TV, pop, etc.). This is not to "show that you're a good Christian" or to "earn points with God". It is an act of worship and of identifying with the sufferings of Christ. When we give up something that is meaningful to us, we are identifying with how Jesus gave up everything He had so that we would be saved. Don't just give up something that you don't value; if you give up something of value (i.e. something hard for you to give up), it helps you feel more of what Christ felt- after all, Christ gave up all the beauty and joys of heaven and even His own life.
- Consider fasting for 1 meal a day & taking the extra time to pray and/or read your Bible. Again, this is time to prepare yourself spiritually for remembering Christ and the significance of Easter.
You don't have to do these things; and doing them doesn't make you a better Christian and it certainly does not earn you "extra points" with God. These are options for you, things that will make Easter more meaningful to you.

posted by Andy Chang @ 2:45 PM 0 comments