SoulThirst

Haha... Jessica & Nessa came here earlier to work on their English paper ^^;;. That was fun.

Woke up at 4:45 this morning again ~_~ ... and last night I was up till 2:00am. The strange thing is... I don't really feel tired. Must be the fact that, coming back from camp, I slept from 7:30p.m. till 9:30 the next morning ^^;;;. Still been trying to fight off this stupid cold/sore throat thing that I seem to have developed over the weekend at camp. At least it's no longer a drain on my energy the way it was on Sunday; now it's just a bit annoying, having to cough, clear my sinuses, and feel "phlegmy."

I enjoyed sitting under the teaching of Jerry Root again, even though most of it is repeated from all the classes I've had with him, it was still just as engaging, just as challenging. Most of you would have to simply take my word for it, but it seems that no matter what the class topic/title is, he always uses the same stories and same points in all those classes. Sometimes I wonder how that's possible... how a class on "Intro to Christian Education" can use the same stories as a class on C.S. Lewis. But more so than just the content of Jerry's talks, is how real it is when he says it. Again, most of you will have to take this by faith, but having heard Jerry say the same content over & over, I've realized that the "power" of his talks is actually not so much in the content, but it's in the person delivering it. I think someone else could take Jerry's talks, re-use the exact same points, and it would not have the impact that it does coming from him. That, I believe, is because the content of his talks is real to him. I've watched this man live out a life of loving God, loving people, and being honest with his own scratched-record; it sounds real because it is. It's easy to say "well of course, that's the way it should be." But how often I recognize how far my words (teaching, preaching, sharing) are such a far distance from what is lived-out. We do indeed live below the level of our convictions. Yet Jerry is an example to me of where someone of faith could be at... 30 years from now, when I'm his age, I would want to be at the place where he is in his relationship with God. Jerry's shared, time & again, that he's got a scratched-record like everyone else, and I don't have the illusion that somehow he is any more holy than the rest. But the difference with him is that his faith is lived out... he got there because he's always learning, always desiring to love Jesus more.

Because of being sick, I don’t feel like I got to enjoy camp as fully as I could’ve. But even so, the testimony time was such a blessing, and yet painful at the same time. It’s so easy to forget that a “youth group” is made up of individuals, each with a multitude of joys, pains, and burdens. And of course, during the course of the week-to-week at church, everyone looks fine. These times at camp remind me that there’s much more going on in the lives of the youth than meets the eye, that even when all seems well, they still need prayer. The testimonies gave me a good starting place to know how to pray for them.

I went up to share too, which is not something I usually do. But I felt convicted, largely because of my very visible impatience with almost everyone throughout the course of the beginning of camp. I suppose it’s due to being high-strung over camp planning, but it’s of no excuse. But it spite of my impatience and lack of love, I was humbled by how much they loved me. This came out in the little ways… small comments someone would make, the way some of them related with me, and at times, what someone would actually come out & say. And despite my goofiness, I’m well-loved here, a love which I do not deserve & cannot ask for.

David Hansen wrote in his book The Art of Pastoring that he as a pastor feels that HE is the one who needs to thank the congregation, not the other way around; I tend to agree with him. It’s really not the youth who are to be thanking me. It’s I who should thank them:
- for giving me trust and access to their lives
- by allowing me to pray with them, share with them
- for being teachable
- for being gracious when I’m really in need of their grace.
- for the opportunities of growth that serving them has given me
- for encouraging my own walk with God when I see God working in them
At camp, and here too, I want to take the opportunity to thank the youth group, for allowing this goofy scratched-record person to be in your midst and to be involved in your lives.

I thought of something during camp. Sometimes I get asked if there’s anything that the people can do to help me do my job. I can think of one thing: let me know how I can pray for you. In this way, I don’t have to guess, nor do I have to pull prayer requests out like pulling teeth. Please do feel free to tell me how to pray for you all.

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Afternoon Bible study at Wheaton was fun; glad Esther could join us. Ran around Naperville to help Rachel move stuff, then went back to Wheaton for Joyce’s recital. Beautifully sung- especially the 3 Chinese pieces. Gordon & Julie drove out here from Pittsburgh too for it (hey Belinda, if you’re reading this, it’s the same Gordon & Julie that you know out at CMU. Small world, huh)

Ok. I have 3 minutes to post before midnight :P. This post feels so… scattered and not tied-down. Oh well. Will write more about camp in later days; it’s not the weekend that matters, as much as what happens in the weeks to follow

posted by Andy Chang @ 11:53 PM